* i*m still grounded...ya it sux....right now i*m in barrington at my mom*s. i juz got off the fone...i*ve been talkin to jenna for hours...she wanted me to call tash to make sure she calls jenna back, and tash is like don*t fucking worry about it i*m not calling her. i don*t get that but it pisses me off. o well.....i guess i gotta call jenna back now. i*m so sick of not being able to hang out i*m ready to duct tape my dad up in his closet and torture him. it*s horrible. i*m kicked outa my house for the summer, and my parents are prolly gona make me stay at my mom*s nxt yr too which is bullshit. i hate my dad, too bad he lives in dover and that*s where i wana be. i*m not living in barrington no fucking way. it*s so boring, and unless i*m allowed to smoke myslef retarded everyday there*s nothing to do. at least i*ve got alot going on over the summer, first i*m going to colorado to see my aunt for 2wks, then dc with my grandma for about a wk, then brantwood camp for 2wks, then california with my mom. obviously they*re spaced out, but inbetween i*ll juz have my mom drop me off in dover everyday wen she goes to work and i*ll chil til she gets outta work at night. and there will be lots of sleepovers so i don*t get too bored and decide to drown myself for entertainment.

funny idea of the day: "life is like a set of stairs and every time i climb a step i seem to fall right back down on my ass"   &nb sp;   &nbs p;  well get a mattress and go mattress surfing, that*ll be faster! lol (if u*ve never been matress surfing u won*t get it)*

*tomarrow i*m learning how to shoot a gun. fun fun. this whole week has pretty much sucked so i might as well let my anger out on some stupid clay pigons whos only sin was being clay. i*ve been sitting in barrington all day bored out of my fucking mind. i had alot of fun with natasha this wk, but then maddie had to be a bitch and tell me that i*m a bad frnd to tash, so while i really don*t care wat she says i wana kno y tash would go complain about me to her. o well....more bullshit. that*s y i*m not doin the whole best frnd thing again. i really need new frnds....here*s a review of how all the ppl i used to chil wid has gone their seperate ways:

kelley-it*s funny how someone who was so close and bffl for so long can jus stop being ur frnd and not care at all, seems i played the fool?

chrissy-she*s never really liked me, and i pretty much knew it all along

tash-thought we were close, but i guess i piss her off alot wen i don*t agree with her, and talk about sarah. but regardless, i*ll always love tash

sarah-we*re frnds, but she randomly decides not to chill with anyone who hangs out with tash, and that*s me

that*s about it, so i guess i need a new crowd, bcuz i*m tired of all this bullshit and no trust. i have plenty of trustworthy frnds, their juz all in different towns. schools gonna suck. lol i guess it*s almost over, and me and mom were talking about me moving to california next yr, like seriously talking about it. idk where thats goin, but if i really can all i need is a plane ticket and i*m gone*

*yay it*s sunday and i*ve got all week to lay around in my pajamas (among other things) friday me n tash went to the barrington dance...it was fun but we say this girl kayla who we were both frnds with like 3yrs ago and we had to stick up for her cuz everyone was trying to jump her. lol it was kinda funny. now i*m chilin in btown and i think i might go see kevin later cuz i saw him at the dance and he wanted to hang out. i*m kinda debating weather to blow him off or not.......i wana see him but i*d prolly get less hurt avoiding him. me and kelley are not friends. rumors are still going around that she*s talking shit about me but w/e....she*s not my friend or enemy so she can do wat she wants. somehow everyone thinks we*re gona be frnds again, even tho i say we*re not...it kinda pisses me off that everyone assumes i have no controll and will give in as soon as she wants to be frnds again. i really need to straighten out my life. for starters i*ve learned a lesson. bffl is bullshit and by putting all ur trust into someone ur sure to get hurt. on a better note tash is taking me with her and her family to an all expense payed week in a cabin and we*re gona go to six flags for like 3days! i*m soO excited! plus sometime this wk i*m gona see jenna too! so i get to see the two ppl who are actually there for me right now! but i won*t fall into that bffl shit again, i think i*ve learned my lesson, although i should*ve learned it from natalia. things will get better*

* well i*m reallllly bored rite now and i want kelley to get her ass home cuz i really can*t do anything til she gets here. that sux. i*d be like fuck it and go chil wid tash or sumthin (sarah*s in mass) but then wen kelley finally got back frm dezi*s she*d be pissed and it*d be more fucking drama. at least my computer wrks now. i*m talkin to lyndsey who i haven*t talked to in like a yr so i*m good. lol and my speakers work now too yay!*

lyndsey andrews is sOoooo loved...cuz i say so!